Thursday, March 20, 2008

i want you

It's almost my birthday and today is the first day of spring. I'm not sure what the connection is but both dates make me happy. :D

I've been thinking of what I could give myself as a birthday gift(s). I have been very reluctant to buy myself anything these days since my bills just keep coming. If only that Visa(?) commercial works in the real world, my life would be so much easier. Anyway, dreams are free and that is what I'm gonna do. I would like:

- to buy a lens for my fancy camera. Even though I have not yet discovered how much fun I'll have with my Rebel, it sounds like a good idea. I have taken the first step and bought myself a book about my camera. Haha.

- a bag. I have a couple of bags that I interchange for fun but I need an everyday, good quality bag. Something that will not tear and have weird bumps just because I stuff my house in it.

- to buy new shoes. Yes, more than one. My sister insists that I should buy something different to my favourite gold ballet shoes and my trusty white Nike.

- trip to Disney. I've been there once and I would like to go again. There's just something about Disney that makes me feel (more) like a kid.

Hopefully I'll have one of these for my birthday (all will be better).

If not, I can just convince myself that the vacation my siblings and I are planning at the end of April is my gift. I just really hope this one actually happen. If they back out or something uncontrollable prevents us from going, I will be splurging on something. :D

Sunday, March 2, 2008

it's 3 am

After happy moments, I often think of what could go wrong.
They did say fairytales are not true.
But didn't they also say that without sad moments, there wouldn't be happy ones?

Tonight, I can't help but wonder if some things are too good to be true.

We had a somewhat serious talk after some silly misunderstanding.
Words can be tricky.
One after another, he dug himself in a hole instead of trying to climb out of it.
He didn't mean it that way afterall.
Thankfully, in one great, but effortless leap, he saved himself.

And that is why I love him.

There are times I just look at him and think to myself how lucky I am.
It is all mushy and public display of affection, both in words and well, in public is not something I'm always comfortable with but this is my personal space.

Marriage at my mental age is amusing at most.
I am not ready for it yet at this moment, 3 in the morning to be exact, I wouldn't mind it.

I probably just need sleep. :)