Friday, June 29, 2007

it's gonna be a lovely day

Everyday the phone rings and everyday I answer it hoping my effort won't be for nothing. But of course, it's the same damn number. I answer only to hear the busy tone. Upon a quick search in ever reliable Google, I found a forum board of some sort discussing the same calls they get from this number. Ack! I'd rather get telemarketers than this nonsense.


After three weeks of freedom from my braces, I finally have wire retainers. The dentist and her assistant must have told me to ONLY take it off when I'm eating. They know me too well. Although it is less obtrusive than my braces, I feel more uncomfortable with it. And just like the same appliances that block the movement of my tongue before, it results in some sort of lisp or unrecognizable words.


It's Canada Day on July 1 and it translates into a long a weekend. Yey! Unfortunately, I can't leave the house, at least not for the whole day like I would normally do, due to familial obligations. He agreed to keep me company and probably just watch movies and eat pizza for the whole day. My parents are going camping and my siblings have a life of their own.

What I would really like to do is go to the park and play with a Frisbee or badminton. We don't have either.

Maybe I was just inspired while watching Wimbledon to move around.


I didn't gain a single pound while on my summer break. If anything, I lost at least two. Ack!

* The title will be a tribute to those optimists. Including me. Most of the time.

Monday, June 25, 2007

kiddy adventures

After 5 days of staying at home and not doing ANYTHING summery, the weekend balanced my inactive life.

We went to the arcade, which to my dismay did not have any fighting games to satisfy my sometimes violent self. Fortunately though, they had one of those deals wherein for $25, you can play for four hours. Woo hoo! We initially thought that four hours will eventually bore us but that didn't happen. We were even a bit sad when it went by so fast.

I am proud to say that my shooting skills was way better than his. He only beat me in the end because it's kind of tiring to hold the gun straight. And another accomplishment was finally racing with 7 other people and not being the last one. On our way home, he even said "I can't believe you know how to drive like that. It made me like you more". Hahaha. Bonus points for me. :D

As for Sunday, it was spent with him at the church and at a kid's party in the park. I'm really happy that I did go to church because they had a speaker that lived a life one can only imagine. It really takes an interesting story/person to keep my attention for longer than 30 minutes. After that, we headed to the park which was one of the biggest I've ever been to. I wish I had a bike to explore it or at least a mat to just relax in. The highlight of that park trip was unfortunately when he decided to leave me sitting by myself to sleep for a bit. He woke up with bird poo on his face. Hahaha. They say it's luck, I say otherwise.

After watching SYTYCD, I fell in love with this song: Dancing by Elisa.

I'm dancing in the room as if I was in the woods with you
No need for anything but music
Music's the reason why I know time still exists

Thursday, June 21, 2007


As I requested, Paul interviewed me. I hope my answers made sense. I just realized that I can never be interviewed because my answer will always be vague or safe. ;)

1. Was there any college course you wanted other than nursing? Why do you want that?

If talent, skills and creativity would not be a problem, I would have loved to take something art related. I was properly introduced to art when I was in Grade 9 (first year hs). There's just something about art that's challenging and liberating. Unfortunately, I was somewhat of a perfectionist which did not really work since I'm not naturally artistic. Errr.

2. What would make you leave Canada and decide to stay in the Philippines for good?
If I'll have the same opportunities and perks of living in Philippines as I do here in Canada. If I list all of those, I might end up sounding like an ungrateful child.

3. What's your typical day like? What do you want to change from it? Why?
Since I am unemployed (until July), my typical day is lounging around the house. I wake up, eat, daily dose of internet-related stuff, sing karaoke, watch TV, look after my grandma and do some chores. As much as I love staying home, I get restless and start to imagine all the things I could do. I would love to go bowling, play in the arcade, go to parks, visit art museums, have dinner/lunch dates (friends) or walk around downtown. ANYTHING but nothing. Life at the moment is monotonous and I need it to change because this will be the last summer break I get once I start working.

4. What's the nastiest thing you have ever done to a guy? Why?
I don't think anything I have done to a guy would be qualified as nasty. ;) Is that being too safe? Haha. I might have to get back to this question another time. :D

5. What's the most daring thing you've done so far?
This unfortunately will affirm the fact that I am quite boring. I don't think I have done anything that will be considered daring by myself or those that personally knows me. It would be fun to ask them because maybe, just maybe, I have in fact stepped out of my box every now and then.

So yes, the last two questions I failed. Haha. Thanks for the questions Paul, I will have to do something about those ones and maybe I'll have a better answer next time. ;)

Monday, June 18, 2007

another milestone

I finally graduated. My four years in university ended at the same place I started my orientation as a clueless first year student. It was kind of an emotional day even though I didn't shed a tear. It felt like highschool. Only this time, I don't have an award and my name wasn't mentioned as one of the the honour students. I miss being a nerd.

My parents and cousin attended the three hour long ceremony. Th
ey even saw me in the screen because the school wanted to sell and broadcast it live for those who did not have a chance to go inside the theater and those that could only watch it online. I think that's kind of cool. :D I was talking to the girl beside me and I don't like video cams so I opted not to make any eye contact. Haha.

To celebrate, my mom decided that we should go to a Japanese restaurant where they cook your food in front of you. It was my second time there and I'm still amazed at the skill of the chef (?). He was pretty funny too. He actually launched a shrimp tail on my dad's forehead pretending to aim it on his mouth. My dad's bald which made it even funnier. Errr.

All in all, it was fun and I can now have a big sigh of relief. :D

Graduation loot bag: a jogging (?) pants with NURSE written behind it (haha), an overpriced frame to display my degree on, money, two dresses and a shopping spree at AE.

As one girl told me, "someone's on cloud 9".

Monday, June 11, 2007

wedding plans

No, I'm not getting married yet. I just thought I'd get that out of the way.

On our way home, my friends and I talked about what kind of details are needed to have a decent wedding. I've never been one to constantly think of how it will be like. I'm the complete opposite of that girl in the movie The Wedding Planner. I don't have a book of cut-out pages from a bridal magazine or even a theme that I must have. I even cringe at the idea of everyone looking at me/us for the entire time.

One of them decided that a cherry blossom theme would suffice while a message-in-a-bottle seems like a romantic ide
a imagined by the other. I joked that if I get married first, one of those will definitely be mine. That just shows my lack of creativity. This is how our conversation went:

me: In my wedding, you guys will have to wear rainbow-coloured dresses. I can't have you looking prettier than me.

friend: I'm not getting married. Live-in sounds like a good idea.

friend: I'm only inviting 25 people. That's it.

friend: I don't need flowers. Who cares? All I need is one for myself.

him: Do you want to get married?
me: No, not right now.
him: When?
me: You don't know me yet. Trust me, you don't want that.
him: What makes you say that?
me: And besides you're not ready yet.
him: Umm..yes I am.
Whatever. [giggles]
him: I'm serious.
me: Ask me again when you know for sure I'll say yes.
him: That's what scares me. You might not say yes.
me: Then I guess you better make sure that it is the right time.
him: ...

(I'm really sweet. Errr.)

The picture was taken during Luminato. There were 20 high-powered beams controlled by 10 sensors that translates the heartbeat of the person holding the controller into how the light will move and flicker. I could have stayed up hours and hours just looking at it. The Brazilian drummers (I think) also played a couple of stimulating musical beats that attracted a lot of body-shakers. Haha.

Really, no plans of getting married yet. No matter how many times people ask. I'm sure the phrase never say never might come up but really. Errr.

Friday, June 8, 2007

the aftermath

Just like other things in life, the end of the exam was bittersweet. I'm relieved and happy that it is finally done but at the same time, scared out of my mind as to what the result will be.

Almost everyone who wrote that exam walked out feeling unsure of their fate. I'm trying so hard to be optimistic by saying that miracles do happen. I guess all I can say now is I tried my best. I'm just hoping that the next phrase won't be, but I guess my best wasn't good enough.

I think I've been singing karaoke wayyy too much. Haha.


I finally had my braces off yesterday. After five years, it feels weird to brush my teeth without the roughness of the wires. The toothbrush just glides with minimum effort that I actually enjoy it. Haha. The only funny thing about them are the way my teeth looks yellow. Sigh. I can't wait for my cleaning appointment on Monday.

I'm back to my old job: part-time gardener. The forget-me-nots and bleeding hearts are blooming once again. I'm tempted to take lots of pictures and post them everywhere in my room. It's been a while since I took random shots anyway.

The weather is still a bit temperamental. A forecast of thunderstorm today and bright sunny weather tomorrow.


I have about five days to look for a graduation dress. Sigh.

Another thing to sigh about is that I can't go to Cancun with my friends. They were trying to convince me to just use my magical card and worry about paying it later. I would have said yes if the cost was half of what it really is.

Tuesday, June 5, 2007

the day before

Same time tomorrow, I will be in my seat with hundreds of nurses taking the exam to have that coveted RN title after our name - if we pass. *dun dun dun*

I've been a wreck since the week started because just thinking of it makes me either (a) cry (b) plan what I will do if things doesn't work out (c) read pages upon pages of diseases or (d) sing karaoke. I can't wait to get this over with. Hopefully the end result will be good.

He came by to give me a good luck hug today. It was a surprise. Even though he only stayed for 10 minutes because he had to go to work, it was really sweet. I find small things like this makes me happier than grand gestures.


Why is it soooo gloomy?! The sky is gray, its been raining since the weekend and the breeze is just too cold. Sigh.

I'm kind of hoping that by Thursday, the sun will shine once again and stop this silliness.


I've been shopping even though I don't have an income or money. How is that possible you might ask? Well, by a magical card that you swipe. Eek! This week, I bought two tube tops and two tank tops. It's kind of reasonable because I don't know if I can wear the tubes by themselves. It seems risky. And besides, they're not expensive. Errr.


Okay, I'm gonna study now.

Saturday, June 2, 2007

between you and me

The thought of failing scares me. It is not even about feeling stupid after it that I am worried about, it's the fact that EVERYONE knows that I am taking it.

My friends and I talk about it all the time. How many times have I heard my parents talk about money and how I can finally help pay whatever debt or loan we have acquired over the years? How many conversations have I had with family and friends about the fact that I am going to finally be a nurse?

I've joked so many times that if this ever happens, I will either (a) lock myself in a room and never leave the house (b) check myself in the nearest mental facility (c) commit an unspeakable deed (d) go back to Philippines and let four months pass by.

I'm an optimist but if my friend who is part of many nursing clubs a.k.a. smart-enough-to-be-invited-to-fancy-ceremonies, on the Dean's list and an all around A+ student almost failed the readiness test, what about me? I'm not stupid but I don't retain information as well as I used to. Sigh.


It seems like I have trust issues, relationship-wise. It's not that he isn't trustworthy or that I think he will ever cheat on me, I just feel incapable of giving myself fully. There's always that voice in my head reminding me to take a step back in case our relationship doesn't work out. Sometimes I just tell it to shut up but it comes back.

I don't keep it a secret. I tell him. He assures me and I say okay. It's a cycle.


I missed the PostSecret exhibition because I was too drained from studying. The weather was also uncooperative and decided to rain at random times. I'm kind of disappointed because it's the only one planned for this year here in Canada. Sigh.